![]() ![]() I’m going to become a researcher at the Conference Board. Personally, if I can’t be a sea captain, or a stucco mason, I know the career I’m going to choose. If your lifelong dream is to be a stucco mason, I’m certainly not going to burst your balloon. Whether enough people in these over-crowded professions will jump ship, and then jump on a ship, is difficult for me to predict. ![]() Sad to say, the job market of the future will not be kind to “food preparation workers, cashiers, telemarketers, plasters and stucco masons, waiters, actors, cooks, credit analysts and cabinet makers.” We just have too many of these people, which depresses salaries, which depresses me. If the Conference Board and I have failed to present you with future career opportunities where projected shortages will get you megabucks, allow us to share with you the career choices that are likely to keep you mega-poor. Really! Remember your childhood dream of being able to shush people with impunity? Well, now’s the time to get yourself to library school, because the librarians we already have are rushing to retirement, and the hot new superstar librarians coming up can not possibly provide all the shushing we are going to need. I know you’ve never passed a pool of wastewater, or, for that matter, passed out in a pool of wastewater, without saying to yourself, “By George, I could treat that.” And you didn’t know even know there were beaucoup bucks involved.ĭo the glamorous worlds of power plant management and wastewater treatment seem like a lot more excitement than you could handle? There are some low-key jobs that are also showing great growth potential. Though it is difficult to believe, the Conference Board’s researchers have found that young people are spurning this profession. Wastewater treatment is another area primed for future growth. If it has something to do with teaching people how to goof off at their jobs, and not only get away with it, but thoroughly believe that they deserve major raises for all they don’t do, occupational therapy could be right up your alley. This should give you time to figure out what the heck an occupational therapist does. Occupational therapist is another career that is expected to be plagued by shortages in the coming years. 01 percent of the time when things go, shall we say, nuclear, you might find yourself the subject of a rather negative focus in the press, but what the heck – you’ll be glowing so brightly you can easily get yourself a job as a floor lamp. I think you would be especially good at operating a nuclear power plant, which is a really cushy job 99.99 percent of the time. Power plant operators are projected to be short supply, and that seems like a terrific job – if you have to stay on land. Of course, if you get seasick watching “Baywatch” reruns, or don’t look good in a uniform, or simply don’t want to go down with the ship, there are other careers that are the upswing. Or, maybe, with global warming making ocean levels rise, we’ll just need more sea captains to run the new commuter boats that will be transporting passengers from under-water Manhattan to under-water Miami. ![]() Maybe the all the Harvard and Stanford graduates who would normally become sea captains have decided to become investment bankers, instead. I’m not sure why sea captains turn up on high on the most-wanted list. According to a recent Lauren Weber article in “The Wall Street Journal,” the Conference Board, a corporate-research organization, has “examined the risk of labor shortages in 464 occupations, projecting shortfalls for a majority of them.” ![]()
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